Category: Dr. Dot

I am proud to introduce the newest member of the world wide Dr. Dot massage team.

Jaime is as strong as an Ox, something that is highly sought after in the massage world.

She is very qualified, punctual as a German and is is my rep in the Detroit area. If you

are heading that direction or are already there and want an amazing massage, just

drop me a line and I will sort it out. Read about Jaime in her own words below and

you can see her picture as well.

 Cheers,

x Dr. Dot

 

Hey Hey! My name is Jaime and I represent the fabulous city that is known as
the Motor City, also known as Detroit, Michigan! I
am a Certified Massage Therapist. I made my way to Colorado to attend school
at the Denver School of Massage Therapy. As you head west in the USA, massage
becomes a very big deal and is common in many peoples lifestyles. I wanted
to learn everything I could and bring it back to the state of Michigan where
it is still a growing industry. People seem to be stuck on the idea that
massage is just a “day at the spa pamper yourself kind of thing. Well, yes
it can be that. But more importantly, it has become a way to maintain good
health in our day-to-day stressful lives.

I fell in love with massage several years ago when I received my first
massage. I never knew my whole being could feel that good. So, I started
looking into the field and decided it was a good thing for me to pursue;
something that I could “give” people and not just “get” for myself. I have
the strength in my upper body, hands and arms because for 8 years I was very
into percussion. Marimbas, xylophones, drums…if it had a beat, I loved it.
I’ve always been passionate about music…playing, reading and writing it. Now
I have two passions, music and massage. They go together pretty well, too.

I work for an amazing acupuncture clinic as a massage therapist. I see many
patients that come to us as a last resort for pain. Seeing them leave with a
sense of relief and on their way to a better quality of life is a very
rewarding benefit of my job. Some of the styles of massage I use are Deep
Tissue, Swedish, Reflexology, Sports Massage, Cranial Sacral Therapy, and
Seated Chair Massage. I will soon be Nationally Certified and will be
continuing my massage education with the many different classes and seminars
offered.

I am very proud to be a part of Dr. Dot’s team and look forward to massaging
anyone that comes through the Detroit area. You won’t be disappointed, that’s
for sure.

My favorite quote to leave off with is by Winston Churchill.
“We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.”

www.drdot.com 

  ^ To see all of my massage team

Q.
Hello  Dr.Dot  I am just curious. Do women masturbate as often as men. Do you
have any definitive current stats, not out dated Kinsey report numbers. Also do women use porn to masturbate
like men, and how do women get this
porn. I never see them buying any when I go into the local sex video store.
Men just want to know this info so that we don’t feel like we are weird or anything. Signed, Just Curious.
Thank You. P.S I love and read your
column!!

Just Curious

 

 Girls watch porn too, we just never get caught ^

A.
I believe there can never be any reliable statistics as women do these things
discretely but I can tell you, I know thousands of women,
all over the world, as I travel way too much and us gals talk about sex, so I
know first hand that women do masturbate, but not as often as
men and most of them use a ‘fake man’ (they build one out of pillows to ride
on) and use their fingers rather than dildo’s. Most, including myself, need porn to reach orgasm,
as magazine images or phone sex isn’t enough. Where do we buy this porn? We
get a man to buy it for us, or shop on-line. Although, one summer
I house-sat for my Gay uncle and thought his gay porn would do the trick,
well, it didn’t. So I had to find a seedy video shop and yes,
I was the only women in there. The men all hit on me, even the owner of the
shop, but I was brave, I got my toys/videos and survived.
This is why you will rarely see a female in such shops, that and the fact
that women can get laid so easily, they don’t need to masturbate,
we can just say, "c’mere buddy, I’m horny."
That has got to be the biggest benefit of owning a pussy, no matter how fugly
the woman, she can still get laid whenever she wants.

Q.
I am dating a younger man, much younger. I am 17 years older than he
is. I look and feel very young for my age, that’s why I always attract younger guys. Many people I know give me shit
about this, they wind me up and always tell me the negative aspects of dating such a young man. I think you
could be the one to help me put my mind at ease. Keep in mind this young man is extremely mature for his age and
we get along perfectly.

Ripe Rita

  

Couples with a BIG age difference ^

A.
I may sound like a hippie when I say this, but we only live once, so get it
while you can. I find it really revolting
that older men, like Michael Douglas, Mick Jagger, Rod Stewart, Donald Trump and many other
old geezers can marry/fuck/buy women
half their age, but no one scoffs at that, instead they get their ego’s
stroked "nice one!". Yet when older women
like Demi Moore, Madonna, Joan Collins and Cameron Diaz marry/date younger
men, they get pissed on by a shower
of doubt and criticism. You go girl, do what you want and the next time
someone hisses at you about seeing a
firm young man, tell them: "you’re only as young as the man you feel".

Q.
After 3 years of the same stuff, my girlfriend and I need to find something
new in our sex life. We have been through all the positions and toys but when I
had the idea of another girl, she yelled at me as if I killed someone. how do I
convince her to allow a third party into our bedroom?

Horny Hal

Threesomes can be fun if everyone is cool about it ^

A.

"Third Party"?. Well, you know the rule, Ladies First! Invite a man into your
Fuck-Fest, and see how your first threesome goes over. If you both like it,
then maybe she will let another pussy into your bedroom.

Q.

I have been seeing this hot guy now for a month and sometimes I sleep over his
house (and vice versa) and this sometimes turns into long weekends in bed.
The only problem I have is I have no idea how to fart around him.
I mean, my bathroom is right next to the bed room and if I let one rip,
he would surely hear it. By the end of the weekend, I feel like a floatation
device from holding all that gas in. It gets so bad that I don’t even want
to screw because I’m afraid all that poking and prodding inside me will
push out all those saved up farts. I am serious about this,
I know it sounds silly, but I am going crazy. How long does one have to
wait to fart out loud around a lover? I mean, everyone farts right?
Gassy Gail

 A.

When can one play the fart card, good question. I suppose you have to wait
until the premiere of the awkward "I love you" comes up. First get comfortable
with the "Love" part,
then once you are both in love and have admitted you are in love verbally,
you can break wind. Men think that women don’t fart. They are always shocked
when it happens for the first time. Pussy farts seem to go over without
even an eyebrow being raised but just plain farting is for some reason a
complete turn off (unless you are in West Virginia). You could try the one
cheek sneak, but never on a flat surface (this only works on a pillow or soft
fluffy sofa).
Try having a radio in your bathroom (and bring it to his as well) to blast
out some loud rock music (ac/dc perhaps) to play when you go to the toilet. Just let
‘er rip when the music is loud and no one gets hurt (carry a small spray bottle of
perfume with you or a match). Avoid carbonated drinks, Indian food and any kind of
beans when you know you will see him. If it happens, just laugh about it and blame
the dog/cat/hamster or him if you have to. You could always make it fun by warning
him with the ever popular "Pull my finger".

… FINGERS!"

Finally put the final touches on HELTER SKELTER..

Click    here  to see if you will like it or not  😉

… So, here’s what we have so far. Funny thing is last night my friend Lisa called me in panic:

"Dot! Hackers have got your myspace page again! This time they drew Mustaches on all of your friends faces!"

Nice one. Please add to our collection 😉

 

 

 

 < This Zappa tribute was all Snarky’s idea

SOOOOO great to be back in NYC and Hoboken again, the city is so alive, so crazy, so me 🙂 However, I am Berlin bound again on Wednesday, and oddly enough, not sad about it. I am happy to get back to Jasmine again and support her anyway I can. School just started for her yesterday and I should be there now for her actually, but I had people to see here, loose ends to tie up and stuff to drag back to Berlin. I hate stuff. I wish I could just throw it all away, but there is so much of it and some has sentimental value.

Some clothes are too nice/expensive to just toss into the Good Will container (so I will find friends in Berlin who want the glad rags). No matter where I am, I am happy. I used to loathe Berlin but that was because I let a certain someone and certain things drag me down. Won’t happen again. I know how to deal with grumpy Berliners now and I won’t let them piss on my parade. I do beat myself up A LOT though, for "leaving" Jasmine in 2002. I did visit her every third month though, without fail and stayed for 5 to 6 weeks, so, as she said I "was there too often and stayed too long".

 But still, I feel guilty. She says it was good for her, to gain independence. Sounds good, but now I have a lot to make up for. I am there for her as long as she needs me, no matter what. NYC will always be there, friends and loved ones will to. Lots of change going on, but I’m lovin’ it. Letting life’s river flow how it wants. Couldn’t be happier baby …..Love life, health, band, etc..knock on wood  x

 

Q.

 What medicine i can bye it to make by cock bigger than now

Shrinking Sal

A.

No, don’t believe the hype. Your cock is just like any other muscle in your body, the more you use it,

the stronger and bigger it will get. Use it or lose it.

 

Q.

 I have a strange problem and hope I am not alone. I can not reach orgasm while making love to my girlfriend. I can easily cum when I masturbate, but just can’t get there inside of my girl. We fuck for hours and hours and she feels insulted that I don’t cum and I get embarrassed. What can I do to fix this? Is it because I am already 45? Are my breeding days over or what?

Discouraged Dante

 A.

I may sound like a prick, but it could be you are with the wrong partner. I assume, since you are 45 and just now have this problem, that you have shot your load into a few women in the past. If you are attached to this woman, then stop stressing, tell her to stop stressing and try different positions that make your cock think it’s safe in your wanking hand. She should count her blessings that she has a man who can go on and on without cuming. Tell her your glass is half full, not half empty.

Q.

 Hey Doc, my boyfriends dick is too big. It hurts a lot when we fuck. He wants sex all the time, but I try to avoid it as my crotch hurts for days after. I am otherwise crazy about my semi-rock star boyfriend. Is there anyway to make it less painful or to stretch "it" out so he fits in there better?

 Tiny Tess

A.

Too big? Give him my number. Just kidding. Most women pray for such a tool, hard to imagine it being a burden. Try to avoid doing it doggy style, as this is the posistion that makes even tiny tooled men feel bigger. You could do it in the missionary posistion with LOTS of lube and/or be on top, squatting, so you can control the depth and speed of the penetration. If you blow him for a long time it shouldn’t take him long once he is inside, hence minimizing the pain.

Q.

 I want my guy’s best friend. I HAVE to have this man. He is hotter, smarter, just cooler. How does one do that without hurting anyone?

 Sexy Sadie

A. Sorry, but that is a no-no. If you left your guy for him, the new one would never trust you. You would ruin a friendship and it could back fire. People always want what they can’t have, perhaps that is the enticing aspect. I am not prude, but to me being a buddy fucker is ………

        

right up there with being a home wrecker  ^

Boooooo, hisssssssss.

Q. Are all men fucking liars?This isn’t the first time I built my world around him, gave him my all, and just get lied to.

 Fed-up Francis

A. Sounds like someone has been shit on. I think men fib to prevent hurting feelings. I have never met a man who can be 100% honest

 but you can’t change that. They lie because they know how their girl will flip out if she knows the truth. Best thing is to not flip out,

just keep busy with your own issues/activities and it will eliminate pressure. When you put a man in the center of your life,

 the pressure gets too much for them and they snap. Don’t try to make a man responsible for your whole life, your happiness, etc.

 By the way, women lie too. Push up bras/silicone tits:

 

…..Make-Up and Botox makes them appear prettier, high heels make them taller, corsets make them thinner,

 hair color and colored eye contacts are misleading, pretending to want cock 24/7 at the beginning of a

relationship to lure them in is also a lie, so you see, men are not the only ones who bend the truth,

lighten up or there may come a day that there is no one around to even lie to you.

 

Jasmine and Yolanda, right before we went into the show  (how fucking CUTE are they? They

both have on my vintage Stones shirts)

I blinded Mick with my cheesy camera, sooooo sorry Sir Jagger! ^

On July 21 the Rolling Stones sold out the Olympia Stadium (in Berlin)  yet again. I
don’t even want to know how much the tickets went for, but I am guessing it
was around 100 euro a pop, or more. This nonsense is the main reason I started
trading massage for entrance into concerts in the first place years ago. I
don’t trade anymore, I charge, but I still have the luxury of getting to see
my favorite bands for free.
I had been massaging them all week at the Ritz Carlton Hotel at Potsdamer
platz and was pleased to get my hands on my favorite Stone again, Charlie
Watts. He is by far, the coolest Stone. He may look much older than the rest,
but that’s just because he doesn’t dye his hair to look younger, he isn’t vain
at all, he is just real. Charlie was my first paying customer by the way. Like
I said, up until 1994, I just bartered, entrance/back stage passes, for
massage. Charlie convinced me to take what was just a hobby and start charging……………

……as he said it was "the best massage he had ever had".
Charlie made sure I had 3 tickets and 3 passes for the show on Friday for me, Jasmine and

her friend Yolanda (well, she is OUR friend ). It was
a gorgeous evening, the sun was still shining and every one was ecstatic that
the Stones were breathing the same air as them, you could smell the lads, you got
goosebumps just being in the stadium. Anticipation, beer, sun, music and lots of skin. Oh what
a feeling.

Me and my little cuties  were waved backstage, thanks to our passes.
Each tour the Stones have a different theme for their VIP section backstage.
This year it was called The Rattle Snake Inn. There were fake snakes all over the place,
fake cobwebs, spiders, etc, it almost had a Pirates of the Caribbean feel to it. Another
thing that has changed over the years is that there aren’t any sex bombs strutting
around.

Yolanda, Jasmine and her two school buddies, who were already back stage thanks to their rock star dad) ^

As in, no more groupies. The family atmosphere has replaced what used to be a
large hand full of the most gorgeous, willing women around. It is safe to say, they have grown up now,
well, Mick is still working on it.
One thing that remains the same though is the AMAZING catering. The words
"will work for food" wouldn’t sound shocking if you said it around the Stones because their caterers are the best.
You get to eat and drink anything you want and it’s ALL top quality grub.
All of the Stones, except Mick, pass through the VIP room and say hello and
snack a bit. Sometimes Mick does make an appearance, but not this time. Keith’s lovely wife, Patti was
there, being as sweet and friendly as ever.
 

Keiths LOVELY wife, Patti ^

I had amazing seats but chose to sit at the Mixer instead (sound board). Micks
girl friend, Lawren sat at the mixer most of the show as well. They sold tickets that were
actually on the stage, well, part of the stage’s frame (see picture) for 500 euro each.
The view from these seats were rubbish, the thrill of being ON stage with the Stones is
what lured those rich suckers into buying them.

THOSE fans spent over $600 for those seats!

Now THAT is dedicated (random Stones fan in crowd ^)

The band was as tight as ever, Mick has loads of energy and charisma, but I
personally hate seeing bands play the Olympia Stadium. The sound just seems to float away
and no matter how big the screens are, you rarely get a good view and it feels very
impersonal.
If a band plays that venue, they have literally gotten too big for their
britches. But some love it, they think, the bigger, the better. To be around
thousands of Stones fans and watch them play live together is very
intoxicating.
The had lots of fireworks, the best light show, video screens and when they
played Ray Charles’s "Night time is the Right time" they showed videos of
Ray playing. Lisa Fisher, the Stones back up singer, really let it rip during
her solo. She gives Patti LaBelle a run for her money.

Keith did two solo numbers, Before the Make me run and Slipping Away.

When Keith started to sing, many people in the crowd held up inflatable Palm Trees,

 

poking fun at Keith’s recent tree fall in New Zealand. Keith cracks me up when he sings.

He is so into playing his guitar, that he misses his ques, he just chimes in when he feels like it,

the back up singers all cover him, it’s just adorable.

The "Bigger Bang" tour includes a "B-stage" which is a tiny stage they have in the middle of the

crowd where they play 4 numbers, this gives everyone a close up look, and is in my eyes,

the best part of the show. Most people can’t take their eyes off of Mick, he is so on fire, but

I tend to watch everyone else just as much, so I don’t miss anything. I thought it was cute

how there was a tiny glass wall next to Charlies drum set that had the set list hand written on it.

Ronnie played perfectly all night, smiling and having a blast, some say he is the better guitarist, but

only some. The audience was made up of people from every age group and with a set list

like the one they whipped out, they satisfied everyone.

 There was loads of audience participation and also tears. Tears of joy and perhaps

some tears of fear and sadness, that this very well could be the last time they see the Rolling

Stones in concert again.

In case you wanted to know, this is their current line up (which shows they now have more Americans in the Stones

line up than English)

Mick Jagger – Vocals, Guitar (Streets Of Love)
Keith Richards – Guitar, 12-String Acoustic Guitar, Vocals
Ronnie Wood – Guitar
Charlie Watts – Drums
Darryl Jones – Bass, Background Vocals
Chuck Leavell – Keyboards, Background Vocals
Lisa Fischer – Background Vocals, Percussion
Bernard Fowler – Background Vocals, Percussion
Blondie Chaplin – Background Vocals, Guitar, Percussion
Bobby Keys – Tenor-Saxophone
Tim Ries – Saxophone, Keyboards
Michael Davis – Trombone
Kent Smith – Trumpet

If you live in CA, you can help save the Polar Bears. You see, the CA Congressman, Richard Pombo is the one pushing for oil drilling in the

Polar Bears habitit. Dropping him a "friendly note" that i have prepared below will show him that this is NOT  a good idea.

First, please read HERE on how Polar Bears are dying off…

Then click HERE   then click on CONTACT ME,

and copy and paste the letter below to this wanker (it only works if you have a CA address)- so if you don’t live in CA, you

could use someone elses CA address to help too 🙂

Copy this please:

" It’s August and America’s vanishing polar bears are feeling the heat. Scientists fear that habitat loss could drive them to extinction in the next century.

 In fact, things have gotten so bad for the bears that some have even resorted to cannibalism. None of this seems to bother YOU, Congressman Richard Pombo.

Even on the heels of a major oil pipeline leak just miles away,  you are still pushing for harmful drilling in our polar bears’ most important onshore denning habitat.

 I am outraged and will spread the word, no more votes for you until you stop the evil plan."