Joe Jackson interview by Dr. Dot

#TBT a Cover story interview I did with Joe Jackson in 2008, in Berlin, Germany where Joe had a flat not far from mine. I was a columnist for the ExBerliner magazine for 14 years, my monthly column was called “Ask Dr. Dot” but they also paid me to sometimes interview Rock and Pop stars since I know them personally and speak fluent German and English. Here ya go:

‘Steppin’ Kraut

Sub:

Legendary British musician Joe Jackson confides in star columnist Dr Dot about his career and new Berlin home

You know Joe Jackson, the British singer, composer and musician, famed for hits such as ‘Steppin’ Out’, ‘Is She Really Going Out With Him?’ and ‘It’s Different For Girls’. He’s won a Grammy, written film music for Francis Ford Coppola, and collaborated with everyone from Marianne Faithful to William Shatner. Growing up in ordinary conditions in the south of England, with success he has become an urban cosmopolitan, with residences in London, New York and – since last year – in Berlin – where he is continuing his fight against the prohibitionists of the anti-smoking movement. Sexy sex-columnist and star masseuse Dr Dot invited Jackson to her Kreuzberg apartment for a confidential chat. .

Do you sometimes regret having moved to Berlin?

**Je ne regrette rien. I was living in London before, and it’s become a nasty place: expensive, hectic, horrible traffic, CCTV everywhere. Everyone is stressed out and when you go into a pub, people aren’t relaxing; they’re getting as drunk as possible and shouting at each other. Berlin is **so much more free and relaxed. At the same time, it’s so interesting. There’s great drama here, as you walk around you’re constantly reminded of momentous events.

Does the scene here have any influence on your own musical ideas?

The music scene isn’t my first priority, to be honest. London has more variety, and New York is better for jazz and Latin music. Then again, in Berlin I’ve discovered the Balkan Beats phenomenon, which I love – the wildness and the sort of un-cool coolness of it. As for influences, I feel like **everything is an influence. It all sinks in to the cooking pot of the unconscious and sort of bubbles away. Every now and then I dip a spoon into it and hopefully dish up something tasty. But at that point I can’t tell you any more which ingredient came from where.

In the bonus DVD for your new album **Rain, you give viewers an interesting inside view on this city by pointing out some odd places, like the Karl-Marx-Allee.

You thought that was interesting?! One German paper said it was ‘clichéd’ and it probably was. Sure I’ve found my own odd, quirky corners of Berlin, but I want to keep them to myself. So I end up saying predictable things like, ‘Isn’t it nice to sit by the Landwehr Canal in Kreuzberg on a summer evening?’ But it **is nice.

Do you still think in terms of ‘East’ and ‘West’?

I can’t help it. I started coming to Berlin in 1979. It would usually be on a tour bus from Hamburg. You’d go through two checkpoints and then have to stay on this one road through the GDR. There was one truck stop where we’d always stop to buy East German vodka at, like, 50 cents a bottle. Finally this bus, knee-deep in clanking bottles, would arrive at the Wall and go through another two checkpoints. The West Germans were always mean, while the East Germans were easily bribed with a couple of audiocassettes and a T-shirt.

Anyway, finally you’d be in this intriguing, slightly sinister place. Oddly enough, even though it was a sort of island, enclosed by a wall, it had a sense of freedom and spaciousness. Now it has even more.

You’re an unapologetic smoker. Are you pleased about the Constitutional Court’s partial reversal of the smoking ban?

What I like is that it recognizes that bar owners have some rights, and also that bans hurt business – these things are denied in the UK. What I **don’t like is that it only addresses the issue of the ‘level playing field’. This was the phrase used in England to justify a total ban; they said it was the only way to be ‘fair’. Personally I don’t see how imposing a total ban on everyone is ‘fair’, but respecting the property rights of bar owners and freedom of choice for customers is not fair. But that’s the twisted logic of anti-tobacco for you. People have this naïve idea that they’re noble souls in white coats fighting to save the world … in fact they’re a prohibitionist movement who’ve worked themselves into a position of great wealth and power, and many of them are very nasty people. I mean, I’ve met them, and debated with them, and they’re not the sort of people you’d want to have a beer with.

In your fight to defend public smoking you even use the term ‘anti- smoking fascists’ for those who openly oppose your pleasures. Would you consider yourself a ‘pro-smoking fascist’?

Well, I’m not trying to force anyone to smoke, while they’re definitely trying to force me not to. And smoking in a bar is not ‘public smoking’. A bar is private property and it should be up to the owner. I can live with a choice of smoking and nonsmoking places, but the best solution is just to have a good modern ventilation system and encourage tolerance. The antismoking movement encourages intolerance.

Smokers and nonsmokers have co-existed for hundreds of years, and now they’ve driven this big wedge between us, divided people into the ‘normal’ group and a stigmatized group. This is certainly fascist. As for ‘secondhand smoke’: Dot, I know you don’t like smoke, but I promise you that if you really looked at the evidence, as I’ve done, you would have to come to the same conclusion. It’s nonsense. For every study that shows a tiny, unproven, hypothetical risk, there are six that can’t find anything. And many antismoking activists are well aware of this.

You just turned 54 in August, but look healthier and younger than most of your contemporaries. Is smoking a good recipe against aging?

I think it’s all about moderation and balance, but also about not denying yourself pleasure. I’m in pretty good shape. It could be the healthy diet and exercise – or drinking the blood of young virgins. Probably a bit of both.

Since your first hit single, nearly 30 years ago, you’ve sold millions of records, won a Grammy (for ‘Symphony No.1’), written music for Hollywood films (e.g. **Tucker) collaborated with Todd Rundgren, Ben Folds and Marianne Faithful, and even sang a duet with legendary actor William Shatner. Do you have more goals in life? Anything you would consider ‘a dream come true’?

I’ve always liked the idea of writing for the theatre, but could never see a way to do it that wouldn’t be cheesy. Hopefully our project on Bram Stoker is it and will actually get staged. I’ve been working with a writer and director for a couple of years about Stoker and how he became twisted enough to create **Dracula! It’s a really cool piece, not a Broadway musical, something quite strange and different. I have another project on the back burner, too, which is a tribute to Duke Ellington, with a lot of different people contributing – not necessarily jazz people. Beyond that, it’s all a great mystery. Which is nice.

In your autobiographical book **A Cure For Gravity, you wrote about your experiences before you became successful.

One thing that intrigued me when I was writing it was how horrible experiences, like gigs that were just so god-awful you wanted to die, become funny in retrospect. So I was wondering if I could do some really awful gigs and appreciate the humour then and there. Like, I play the drums a bit but I’m really bad. Maybe I could get a group of equally bad people together, and play some horrible dive somewhere and actually enjoy it this time around. So if anyone needs a really bad drummer, bear me in mind.

Special thanks to Joe, who is normally very private and too busy for interviews, and my friend Björn for his question contributions. Dr. Dot

Steppin’ Kraut

Sub:

Legendary British musician Joe Jackson confides in star columnist Dr Dot about his career and new Berlin home

You know Joe Jackson, the British singer, composer and musician, famed for hits such as ‘Steppin’ Out’, ‘Is She Really Going Out With Him?’ and ‘It’s Different For Girls’. He’s won a Grammy, written film music for Francis Ford Coppola, and collaborated with everyone from Marianne Faithful to William Shatner. Growing up in ordinary conditions in the south of England, with success he has become an urban cosmopolitan, with residences in London, New York and – since last year – in Berlin – where he is continuing his fight against the prohibitionists of the anti-smoking movement. Sexy sex-columnist and star masseuse Dr Dot invited Jackson to her Kreuzberg apartment for a confidential chat. .

Do you sometimes regret having moved to Berlin?

**Je ne regrette rien. I was living in London before, and it’s become a nasty place: expensive, hectic, horrible traffic, CCTV everywhere. Everyone is stressed out and when you go into a pub, people aren’t relaxing; they’re getting as drunk as possible and shouting at each other. Berlin is **so much more free and relaxed. At the same time, it’s so interesting. There’s great drama here, as you walk around you’re constantly reminded of momentous events.

Does the scene here have any influence on your own musical ideas?

The music scene isn’t my first priority, to be honest. London has more variety, and New York is better for jazz and Latin music. Then again, in Berlin I’ve discovered the Balkan Beats phenomenon, which I love – the wildness and the sort of un-cool coolness of it. As for influences, I feel like **everything is an influence. It all sinks in to the cooking pot of the unconscious and sort of bubbles away. Every now and then I dip a spoon into it and hopefully dish up something tasty. But at that point I can’t tell you any more which ingredient came from where.

In the bonus DVD for your new album **Rain, you give viewers an interesting inside view on this city by pointing out some odd places, like the Karl-Marx-Allee.

You thought that was interesting?! One German paper said it was ‘clichéd’ and it probably was. Sure I’ve found my own odd, quirky corners of Berlin, but I want to keep them to myself. So I end up saying predictable things like, ‘Isn’t it nice to sit by the Landwehr Canal in Kreuzberg on a summer evening?’ But it **is nice.

Do you still think in terms of ‘East’ and ‘West’?

I can’t help it. I started coming to Berlin in 1979. It would usually be on a tour bus from Hamburg. You’d go through two checkpoints and then have to stay on this one road through the GDR. There was one truck stop where we’d always stop to buy East German vodka at, like, 50 cents a bottle. Finally this bus, knee-deep in clanking bottles, would arrive at the Wall and go through another two checkpoints. The West Germans were always mean, while the East Germans were easily bribed with a couple of audiocassettes and a T-shirt.

Anyway, finally you’d be in this intriguing, slightly sinister place. Oddly enough, even though it was a sort of island, enclosed by a wall, it had a sense of freedom and spaciousness. Now it has even more.

You’re an unapologetic smoker. Are you pleased about the Constitutional Court’s partial reversal of the smoking ban?

What I like is that it recognizes that bar owners have some rights, and also that bans hurt business – these things are denied in the UK. What I **don’t like is that it only addresses the issue of the ‘level playing field’. This was the phrase used in England to justify a total ban; they said it was the only way to be ‘fair’. Personally I don’t see how imposing a total ban on everyone is ‘fair’, but respecting the property rights of bar owners and freedom of choice for customers is not fair. But that’s the twisted logic of anti-tobacco for you. People have this naïve idea that they’re noble souls in white coats fighting to save the world … in fact they’re a prohibitionist movement who’ve worked themselves into a position of great wealth and power, and many of them are very nasty people. I mean, I’ve met them, and debated with them, and they’re not the sort of people you’d want to have a beer with.

In your fight to defend public smoking you even use the term ‘anti- smoking fascists’ for those who openly oppose your pleasures. Would you consider yourself a ‘pro-smoking fascist’?

Well, I’m not trying to force anyone to smoke, while they’re definitely trying to force me not to. And smoking in a bar is not ‘public smoking’. A bar is private property and it should be up to the owner. I can live with a choice of smoking and nonsmoking places, but the best solution is just to have a good modern ventilation system and encourage tolerance. The antismoking movement encourages intolerance.

Smokers and nonsmokers have co-existed for hundreds of years, and now they’ve driven this big wedge between us, divided people into the ‘normal’ group and a stigmatized group. This is certainly fascist. As for ‘secondhand smoke’: Dot, I know you don’t like smoke, but I promise you that if you really looked at the evidence, as I’ve done, you would have to come to the same conclusion. It’s nonsense. For every study that shows a tiny, unproven, hypothetical risk, there are six that can’t find anything. And many antismoking activists are well aware of this.

You just turned 54 in August, but look healthier and younger than most of your contemporaries. Is smoking a good recipe against aging?

I think it’s all about moderation and balance, but also about not denying yourself pleasure. I’m in pretty good shape. It could be the healthy diet and exercise – or drinking the blood of young virgins. Probably a bit of both.

Since your first hit single, nearly 30 years ago, you’ve sold millions of records, won a Grammy (for ‘Symphony No.1’), written music for Hollywood films (e.g. **Tucker) collaborated with Todd Rundgren, Ben Folds and Marianne Faithful, and even sang a duet with legendary actor William Shatner. Do you have more goals in life? Anything you would consider ‘a dream come true’?

I’ve always liked the idea of writing for the theatre, but could never see a way to do it that wouldn’t be cheesy. Hopefully our project on Bram Stoker is it and will actually get staged. I’ve been working with a writer and director for a couple of years about Stoker and how he became twisted enough to create **Dracula! It’s a really cool piece, not a Broadway musical, something quite strange and different. I have another project on the back burner, too, which is a tribute to Duke Ellington, with a lot of different people contributing – not necessarily jazz people. Beyond that, it’s all a great mystery. Which is nice.

In your autobiographical book **A Cure For Gravity, you wrote about your experiences before you became successful.

One thing that intrigued me when I was writing it was how horrible experiences, like gigs that were just so god-awful you wanted to die, become funny in retrospect. So I was wondering if I could do some really awful gigs and appreciate the humour then and there. Like, I play the drums a bit but I’m really bad. Maybe I could get a group of equally bad people together, and play some horrible dive somewhere and actually enjoy it this time around. So if anyone needs a really bad drummer, bear me in mind.

Special thanks to Joe, who is normally very private and too busy for interviews, and my friend Björn for his question contributions. Dr. Dot’

Dr. Dot on Motor Fm Radio

'm on the radio tomorrow- interview and guest DJ. The show will air on Wednesday, Sept. 2nd at 10 pm Germany time (1pm Los Angeles time, 4pm NYC time).

Go to: www.motorfm.de and click the "Play Motor FM" banner to hear online. interview + my choice of songs in first hour, whooooo haaaaaa

Ask Dr Dot Aug. 25 2009


 I have been writing "Ask Dr. Dot" for over 7 years now. My advice column appears in the Exberliner magazine, NY Rock.com and as "Calling Dr. Dot" in Penthouse forum. Feel free to email me (drdot@drdot.com)  any questions you may have. I answer them free and always change the names around to protect your little secrets from everyone else. 

Dr. Dot

 

Q.


I'm a young "forty something" lady. I've been invited to a concert where I may get
an opportunity to meet some famous dudes. (Aerosmith)
There are going to be tons of little skinny ass chicks(yes I'm jealous), and I just
 want to look hot. Not disgusting, but ya know, it would be nice to be "kinda hot
for a forty year old." I don't have a clue what to wear. I don’t want to be in
running shoes, like eww. Help.
Any pointers?
ps. You always look good.
Mary (from the bus, last tour, you know, leather?)

 

 

A.


Decide what your best assets are-
if they are your breasts, wear a low cut shirt in navy blue and a back pencil cut
skirt to the knees and fancy flip flops or those ballerina shoes in silver. If your
 best asset is your tiny waist, wear a sun dress that has frills where your tiny
 breast sit and again, simple but comfy shoes (high heels make women miserable after a few hours).

Go easy on the make up and hair, focus on your best feature on your face as well and
avoid red lip stick unless your skin and teeth are flawless. Use my secret weapon,
"Hypnotic Poison" and smile no matter what. When speaking, remember, quality, not
quantity works best. If you meet Steve, tell him Dr. Dot says hello. Also, keep in mind,
 I am pretty sure all of the band are taken, as in, in a relationship, so there is no
 need going through hell trying to lure one of them; just be comfortable in your own skin,
 smell nice, smile and radiate confidence which is the sexiest thing of all.
ps. If you don't want to wear a skirt, you could wear Capri’s. Make sure you use a shimmer
 body lotion that makes skin look amazing.

 

Q.


 I'm really puzzled by the fact that my boyfriend would rather eat me out than have sex.
 We see each other a few days a week and have had sex only once in our 3 month relationship
 everything else has been oral, him giving it to me; he never lets me give it to him. It's
like he's crazy about it, that’s all he wants to do. What's going on? Is there something going on?
Suzy Cream Cheese

 

 

A.


If that's your only problem, consider yourself blessed. A man who only wants to lick your
pussy and wants nothing in return? Hold on tight to him. You have obviously seen his cock.
Could it be too small or soft?  Maybe he’s afraid of disappointing you.  Maybe he is afraid
of getting you pregnant (read: Catholic). Many men don't trust condoms or even the pill due
 to former bad experiences ("surprise" pregnancies). Perhaps you just taste so fucking good
 he is addicted. Don't look a gift horse, or cunnilingus master in the mouth.

 

 

 

Q.

I am about to propose to the love of my life. Her brother recently died in
Iraq (why do we send away our young men to this country to far away land and
get them back in boxes; all a mother has left of her son is a fucking flag!).

She cries everyday. I feel helpless.

Should I propose soon….and that will give her some happiness to
take away the pain, or should I wait till everything has settled. I would
marry her Monday if I could, but I just want to get it right for her.

Mr. Right

 

 

A.


I would wait a couple weeks, maybe even a month until after the funeral,
and then propose to her.
You don't want your wedding anniversary to be too close to his death date.
If you do it too soon, she could think of it as just a romantic pity party.
If you wait too long, she could close her heart to love all together and
need a long time to completely open it again.

 

 

Q.


My ex is from Poland and went over there to see her…bout 5 months back anyway
we met at airport, had 4 hour journey back to her place was 7 am!! I was sooo tired
 but she said “lets do it- do you have condom?” Well I did but feeling so tired I
 just didn’t want to…i.e. I’d of been shit lol. So we didn’t and didn’t have
opportunity to do it again. Anyway, I got back home and she ended it per text
message about month later. That got me thinking. I loved her; maybe if did make
love to her on that occasion our relationship would’ve lasted longer? Looking back
 I kinda feel guilty over it. I am dumbfounded and gutted.
Mr. Pitiful

 

 

A.


I’ve had men visit me in the past from far away and I knew for sure they would fall
 fast asleep due to the journey. So I let them be. I expect the same when I visit someone.
 There should be some sort of sexual travel leeway period; an unofficial "leave me
alone for 24 hours please" phase. I think she just used that pathetic excuse to dump you.
 If someone dumps you for that, they aren't even worth thinking about anymore.
 Be grateful you are rid of that impatient wench.

 

 

 
Q.


Please cough up some advice for me ASAP. I have seriously not told ANYONE what I'm about
 to tell you, but this issue is getting too big for me to ignore.
 Basically, my problem is this: I'm in a serious relationship with a sweet but somewhat
 insecure man. He is extremely concerned with making me happy in bed, and after some
 awkward attempts at the beginning of our relationship, he worked really hard to find
out what I liked and is now able to satisfy me nine times out of ten. So it's not out
of sexual frustration that I've started having fantasies about women more and more recently.
 It's something I've always done from time to time, but now for the first time I feel
like I might want to put it into practice. I really want to involve my
 boyfriend in this, at least tell him how I've been feeling, but there's a problem: His
last girlfriend left him for a woman, and he's very touchy on the subject of girl-on-girl.
 He's not against lesbians by any means, but he gets visibly uncomfortable whenever the
subject comes up, changing the topic of conversation, even changing the channel when two
women get friendly on TV. I care about him so much,
and I'm afraid my desires will chase him away. I don't know what to do. Can you help??
 
Potentially Bi in Harlem

 


 

A.


I would love to know if these lesbo fantasies started before or after you found out about
 his ex dumping him for a dike. Be honest and think back. If you started lusting after
women AFTER he told you this, it's simple; you are playing with the forbidden fire.
You know it's taboo and now crave it madly. If not, and you have always wanted to taste
the bearded clam, but want to keep your man,  you should just do this on your own time,
without telling him, as it's obviously not going to work. Give the guy a break. Put yourself
 in his shoes. At all cost, try your best to hide all evidence of your lesbian adventures.
Asking him will only make him more insecure, jealous and you may end up losing him completely.

 

 

 

Q.


I am a proud lady who masturbates on a daily basis. My technique has become
refined in the most recent years and lately I have noticed something… When I
have a very good strong orgasm; my hearing is somewhat diminished. Similar to
when your ears start to go towards popping when going up an elevator. 5 minutes
later my hearing is back to normal. Is this because the blood is rushing from my
ears to my vagina?

Alotta Vagina

 


 

 

 

A.


Good news is, it is fairly normal. Bad news is, I'm gonna have to get all medical
on you to explain it properly. Take a deep breath and read on.
The ear popping is due to excessive dopamine-adrenalin conversion during orgasm while
your tissue and nerve around and in your ear lack of the relaxin/elastin Prostaglandin
to withhold the orgasmic contraction due to a sequence of adrenalin surges during or after orgasm.
 Your auditory nerve is suddenly compressed by the tissue contraction and suffers from
the interruption of nutritional supply due to a sudden contraction of the arteries.
This results in nervous numbness. It can happen in your face, ears, nose, eyes, hands,
legs, pelvic area, or even your whole body. Whew.  Who needs to hear anything after they
climax? I think its mother natures way of shutting everything else out so you can just
 savor the spectacular moments during and after your orgasm.

 


 

Joe Jackson interview, by Dr. Dot

 

This is the magazine I have been writing for the last 6 years. They have my sex column "Ask Dr. Dot" in it every issue. The last page is mine. Sometimes I write other pieces for the mag, like this recent (just hit newsstands Sept 1st 2008) issue. I interviewed my friend Joe Jackson. It hurts my feelings (boo fucking hoo) that my name wasn't credited on the cover, like most magazines do when you land the cover story/interview. But I guess the Exberliner does things differently.  My sex column was voted the Best Column in the Exberliner and now to have landed the cover story thrills me, even though name didn't land on cover. Oh well, you can't have it all 😉

 

I HATE this part below "Sexy Sex-columnist Dr. Dot". Joe also hates it. He said "sounds like I was coming over to your place for a shag!"

grrrrrrrrr! You never have complete control when you are being written about or even if you are the writer, it's all up to the editors. Hope you like the interview anyways

x

 

The ExBerliner turns 5 years old (readers survey)

The English Berliner magazine called EXBERLINER, which I have been writing for, for 5 years, finally printed their reader survey. My column, "Ask Dr. Dot" won 80% of their votes, making my column number 1. I am really flattered and honored Kiss

^ Top half of cover

 

 ^ I am in the top favorite and most hated list too. heh heh.

This is their web site, if you are in or heading to Berlin and want to know what's up in English.

Click  HERE