Video I made today (May 4th 2008) in Central Park:
The Weblog Of Dr. Dot Stein
Video I made today (May 4th 2008) in Central Park:
I have so many pictures from the last few months that I have to cram them all into one fat blog. I have so much going on that finding peace and quiet to blog has become harder and harder. I suppose that's a good thing, when one becomes too busy to sit and write, but if I don't write I feel constipated. My goal this year is t rewrite my book all over again as it's like a patch work quilt right now, in pieces that need to be sewn together. It's overwhelming to me, all the things I have in line to do and yet all I can think about is how Jasmine is doing traveling around Europe. I'm going to just comment on each picture, and hopefully it will end up as some sort of chronological story of the last few months of my life. Well, at least a tiny version of it π
Melissa and I down in Douglasville Georgia ^
"Mel" as everyone calls her and I get along like two peas in a pod. She is my cousin. My Dad, who adopted me at age one, Chester, has two sisters, Nancy and Caron and although we don't share the same blood, they have been my Aunts as far back as I can remember. Caron has two kids, JC and Melissa. Mel is a little fire cracker and I can see a lot of myself in her even though we are not blood related. She has a wild heart and is very passionate about life. She is a clever little cutie who will hopefully go really far and not take any shit from anyone. LOVE YOU MEL!
;It's amazing all the things you see in the suburbs^
My Dad and Mom separated when I was 11 and he then married a woman named Allyson when I was 14. Allyson, my step-mom, had it hard when she joined our family as I was only 4 years younger than her and she had to take on 3 rowdy kids when she married my Dad. Me, my 7 year younger sister, Michele and 9 year younger brother, Chester (Chet the 4th). Then a year later, they had their own child, Zack. Zack is my step brother and we have always gotten along. Zack recently had his own child, above, also named Zack ^
I call him mini-zack. He is a cutie and gets spoiled rotten as you can imagine. He is like a photo-copy of his father. They look exactly alike.
The guy with the sun glasses is my brother Chester. We shared the same Mom but different Dad's (I never met my biological father, an Italian Stallion who was too cool to stick around). Chet married Dana, the woman in the picture with him, and they have a child together (not pictured here) named Chester the 5th! The little girl in the picture is Dana's daughter she had with another man (long story).
Dana is cool as fuck. I wish I had a picture of Chet the 5th, but for some reason I didn't take that many pictures down there, I was just chillin' like Bob Dylan. Plus, I am always unsure about posting pics and info about relatives on the net as some like it, some hate it etc.. So I feel restricted.
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That is Marcel ^, my sister Michele's second son. He is a very serious child, don't remember seeing him smile much but he was pretty much glued to Jasmine's lap the whole time. He loved his cousin Jasmine. Michele has an older son, Danielle, who hangs out non-stop with Chet the 5th, that's probably why I haven't any pics of them, they run around like wild fire the whole time. The only time I saw them hold still was when I hooked up the karaoke machine. They loved it and it was pretty difficult to get the microphones out of their hands. They sang Bon Jovi, the Beatles, Led Zepp, etc.. AND Pat Benetar too. HILARIOUS!
The other pic is of Melissa and Mini-Zack. The family is tight down there. I wish I could stand living there, but I can't. I tried for a few months when I graduated high school, in between Grateful Dead tours and I went Banana's. Not enough Rock and Roll down South. UGH! Also, they are far behind in many things, like no one recycles there (unless you live in DOWN TOWN Atlanta). No one cares about eating healthy. I was cooking some tofu and the family was looking at me like I had two heads. The kids had never seen or heard of it before. They all smoke cigarettes, no one recycles or exercises or like I said, cares about healthy eating. I prefer the NYC pace, where everyone works out, eats healthy and recycles. I need that.
It's not like my family refuses to recycle, it's just not an option in the suburbs in Georgia (and probably most of the states in the USA unless you are in a major city). What the fuck is taking so long people? RECYCLE please. Gotta take care of this planet dammit.
The whole family down in Georgia posed on Christmas for a group picture, all wearing these fake teeth I have in my mouth above. The picture is hilarious but it's a private thing, so just imagine a massive group of people, young and old, all smiling with these teeth in their mouth. They are a humorous bunch; love to have a good time, that is for sure.
The green Jets hat above was given to me in 1988 by Frank Zappa backstage in Long Island. I am sure someone gave it to him, he wore it a while, then just gave it to me. I had it in my closet in Georgia for years then I finally gave it to my aunt Caron as I really hate hanging onto things. She gave it to her husband (who is now her ex) Jim. Jim is still very close to the family and is there all the time. Jim is Melissa's father (and JC's too). Jim brought the dam hat over to my Dad's for a photo-shoot. Hence the above pics. The hat is alive and well. Thanks Jim π
< Jim, with "the" hat.
This picture is from 2000, taken backstage at an Eminem show in Hartford, CT. What the hell is it doing here you say? The girl in the middle is my sister, Michele. As I said, she is 7 years younger than I am and we shared the same Mom (Mom died in 1998 ) . She and Chet the 4th are from my Dad, who raised me and my Mom. Freakin' complicated I know. Anyways, I don't have many pics of Michele and didn't even get a new one of her during my last trip to Georgia, so I am posting this one. I was on part of that Eminem tour, doing massages and when he played in Hartford, my sister begged me to bring her backstage. Em and co were so nice to me and allowed it. She only got to meet Em for like 60 seconds, but this is the pic from that dream moment. Proof, the black dude on the right, was Em's right had man for years. Proof sadly died in 2006 from a gun shot wound. Anyways, my sister was in 7th heaven meeting them. Michele and Chet look like my Mom and I look more like my Italian father (seen pics of him).
Magenta ^
Ok, back in NYC, some friends of mine and I went to see the Rocky Horror Picture show at the Chelsea cinema. They act out the film, as the film plays every Friday night. I played Janet when I was in the 9th and 19th grade in Virgina Beach, Virginia. It was a fight with my Dad and Step mom to get out of the house so late each weekend, but I prevailed and had a blast.
The cast I worked with had a fairy decent looking Frankenfurter, which makes things easier. This NYC cast, however, is apparently not choosy when it comes to casting. I swear to GOD I am not being catty when I tell you their Janet was as useless as a wet paper bag. She was HUGE and not even worth photographing and she showed NO emotion what so ever when delivering her lines, which usually came out much too late. Their Riff-Raff, Columbia and Magenta were out of this world good. Columbia being the best of the whole lot. Their Frankenfurter was in my eyes, too big and too gay. I mean, if you are too gay to even portray Frankenfurter, you need to tone it down a notch.
I went with my buddy Danny and Jill and some other lesbian fag hag he dragged out who hated me when I wasn't accepting her sexual advances. Sorry, I have been there, but I prefer cock. Plus, she wasn't my type.
Riff-Raff and Magenta time warping it ^
Columbia was the fucking BOMB ^ LOVED HER!
Columbia again ^ and my English friend, Jill ^ and I. Jill lives half the time in London and the other half in NYC. We get along perfectly.
Jill and I enjoy going to LIT on Sunday nights in NYC for some karaoke. They have the BEST fucking sound in NYC. Huge song list too, only thing I don't like (there's always something) is that people are still allowed to smoke there. I guess that's why it's called "LIT". Another annoying part is that tattooed guy above ^
He is there every time I go there (the MC told me he hasn't missed a Sunday night since 5 years). He is always high, which isn't the problem, thing is, he can't STAND it when someone else, besides him, is on stage. He is extremely LOUD when anyone else sings. He will stand right in front of you and talk to anyone who will listen (or pretend to listen) at the top of his lungs, that is, if he isn't trying to snag the mic out of your hand and sing with you. He simply can not bear it if all eyes and ears are not on him constantly. I really want to make a documentary about karaoke as each place I have visited (London, Manchester, NYC, Berlin, LA well, all over the place) always has some sort of weirdos fighting over the mic and stage time. It's so exciting to me to see all of this. It's even funnier than a Ben Stiller flick.
Remember the movie "Cable Guy" how Jim Carey invited all of his customers to a karaoke party? It's pretty much like that but louder. I love the drama, and of course I love to sing. But this tattooed punk has the worst breath you can imagine. Like compost heap mixed with a side of rotting gums. He is always asking me to get high and I tell him, as I try and run away, "NO THANKS!". Oh man, the pro's and con's of karaoke. You want great sound, you have to put up with HIM and smokers. You seriously can't win.
Anyways, the picture on the right is of Jill belting out "rock and roll" by Led Zeppelin. Her favorite group is Led Zepp, and I love that.
Oh, another thing about Lit (which is on 2nd ave, lower east side) is that it's ALWAYS filled with colorful strangers. These two chicks were basically parked in front of the stage, making out wildly, I mean, they were the main attraction that night, much to dismay of the ego-maniac bad breathed punk.
Another friend of mine ^ John was there at Lit, celebrating his birthday. He has the "I hate birthdays" look on his face and who could blame him. The chick on the right simply had a magnificent ass, so I had to snap her pic.
I will probably get my face ripped off when Jasmine sees this picture ^. Not because she is hugging my best friend Jonesy, but because she banned me from posting pics of her. But I can not help myself. I mean, I have a few cute pics of her from Christmas and Georgia and from our night out to see the Beatles cover band The Fab Faux, but this one can't be left on my Mac. I have to share it. Two of my favorite people, both of whom I would stick my hand in fire for, together in one shot. So cute. It's worth the wrath that is sure to come my way. π
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MAX, from Berlin, aka Charlie Crawford and the singer of Empty Trash; runner up in German's version of American Idol (Deutschland Sucht ein Super star) came to NYC for a week of fun. No, he didn't stay with me! He is only 19 so get those naughty thoughts out of your mind. Anyways, I showed Max around a bit, as did Jasmine. He is a big star in Germany and can sing his ASS off. I wrote about him already in my Thanksgiving day blog. Click HERE to see it.
Eric Danville ^, managing Editor, Penthouse Forum/ Girls of Penthouse and friend of mine, was sadly mugged the night we were initially supposed to meet to sign my contract. "It happens" he said. Luckily only his arm was hurt, he could have been killed. Anyways, a week later we met at a bar called "2a" because it's on the corner 2nd street and avenue A. It's a really popular hang out for artist and people in the entertainment biz. The wine is as bad as the service BUT it is still fun. The pics above are of Eric and his boo-boo arm and me signing my contract, with Penthouse Forum. My sex column "Calling Dr. Dot" will premier in the magazine's May issue (it hit's news stands on April 14th though). I am so happy and grateful, I won't let them down. Hell, I never let the NY Press down either, my columns were always early and entertaining, they are just unorganized and change editors as often as Lindsay Lohan does boyfriends. Well, you know the saying, one door closes and another one opens. I was sad when the NY Press dropped my column (along with many other columns at the same time) but now I am glad it happened as writing for Penthouse Forum is way better in my eyes.
The night I met Eric at 2a to sign my contract, the service was great. But when Tom Clark ^ isn't bar tending/working, you can fucking forget it. The other bar tenders are too busy making love to their crack-berries to notice you are drying of thirst. Meow.
Anyways, I was there before Eric. Never been in 2a before. I sat at the bar, alone, asked for a wine list. The bar tender shows me a bottle of white and a bottle of red (pretty sure they had screw on tops) and said, "here is the wine list, red or white?". I thought, what a cheeky bastard this guy is. lol. He gives me my wine and then asks "are you Dr. Dot?"
My jaw dropped. Eh? "yes, why? How did you know that? Did Eric tell you I was meeting him here?". He says "Eric who?" then explains he recognizes me from myspace. EH? Still puzzled. I was like "wtf?". He then explains that he and I have been pen pals for almost 2 years, writing on myspace, mostly about music and my desire/obsession for Karl Geary. Karl frequents the 2a fairly often. Tom told me on myspace 2 years ago that he sees Karl rather often "at the bar he works at" and so we started chatting about him and music etc.. anyways, to me, people look different on myspace then they do in person. Especially if you aren't looking for them. I wouldn't have put two and two together in a million years. lol. Anyhow, I felt like a dumb ass that he recognized me but I didn't him until he refreshed my memory. Guess I need to buy a few more mega bites of memory for my head.
Behind the bar ^ …makes me laugh every time I read it.
I was asked to come to a recording studio in Weehawken, NJ to massage the band Matchbox 20. I know the sound man, Jim, for almost 15 years now. I massaged Jim in trade for him tuning up my JBL equalizer in my car. My Amp and equalizer in my trunk are so HUGE you can't really fit anything else in there. It's FUCKING LOUD and now, the sound is even more perfect than it was. Listening to music in my VW Golf is one of my favorite things to do (while driving through NYC, windows down). Anyways, the piano above ^ used to belong to John Lennon. It now belongs to the recording studio. John recorded the song 'Imagine' on that piano. I felt honored to touch it. sigh.
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I went into some rock and roll shop in Greenwich Village and bought a SHIT LOAD of rock and roll t-shirts and all of the guys working there are from Mexico and all had really long hair and were listening to Black Metal, which apparently is "much harder than Death Metal". In fact, they tell me Death metal is just for pussies. Black Metal is the most evil music around. They have it playing really loud and as you shop for rock and roll memorabilia, you think to yourself "mmmm, so if I went to hell and turned on the radio, this is what would be playing".
Back in Berlin I was invited to a VIP party, thrown by several press agencies, news papers etc.. It was fucking boring but the food and drinks were free and in abundance. The above girl band was playing all night. Yawn. I hate VIP parties. |
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This poor bastard is getting married ^. Had to take a pic of this guy on his Stag night in Berlin. Good luck sucker. |
Above ^ Freaky (on the right) and his female companion wearing their lighted baseball hats. I have known Freaky since 1991. He is an artist, jack of all trades and really REALLY fun to watch when he sings karaoke. The words to describe him properly fail me. He calls himself Freaky, so you can just imagine I guess.
Recently my friend "Scruff" was in Berlin and I showed him around. It was sadly gray and raining the whole time he was here but I am sure he enjoyed himself anyways.
BIZARRE light-billboard directly across from the Estrel Hotel, where the "stars in concert" show is held. Do Berliners think that Beastiality is ok? I mean, if this was on display in Boston, I doubt it would go over well. Weirdos!!
I brought Scruff to see "Stars in Concert" which is a show that has been going on in Berlin for almost 10 years. It's all made up of celebrity impersonators. The man who plays Elvis, Grahm, is from Dublin and is one of the worlds best Elvis impersonators and a buddy of mine. He used to do it in Vegas for years, but wanted a change and moved to Berlin. He invited us and paid for everything. The whole experience was amazing but Elvis was by far the best part of the show (The Blues Brothers were pretty good too). It was funny how "Elvis" came out to our table after his part of the show was over (he was in normal clothing) and still had all of his Elvis make up on, as he had to still do an encore. Elvis buying us drinks. Nice.
I fly to France next week, will be there for about 30 hours, then I fly to Rome, stay a few days, then go to Florence. Looking so forward to enjoying Italy again. Ciao Bella
x
My myspace buddy David ( http://www.myspace.com/camovinglight ) brought this video to my attention and I love it so much I had to share it with you. I LOVE IT. Brilliant idea. NYC is full of creative minds. Ahhh, NYC, how I love thee..
^ Taken a few hours ago in an Irish bar, midtown (pretty sure it's called PJ Clarke's), none of the staff was Irish..anyways, they claim to have one of the oldest toilets in NYC. They said they are "over 100 years old". WOAH, that's really old (not!). Baby USA lol…..
I went to PJ Clarke's after a stop in at a bar called 2A, because it's on 2nd street and avenue A. When you ask for a wine list, they roll their eyes and say "red or white, that's our list!". The snotty bartenders barely look up from their Blackberry pearls, so good luck getting their arrogant service. Two good things about the place though are (1) the music (the bitchy bartenders have great shit on their iPods) (2) It's dirt cheap. Just thought I would throw a little review in there, heh heh.
It's bloody cold here in NYC. Been swamped with things to do, people to visit and packing for my journey back to Berlin in a couple days. Once I am settled in, I will spend hours uploading the many pictures I have taken over the last couple of months. I supposed on one hand it's good thing when one is too busy to blog properly, but I find it therapeutic and it helps me sleep better once I've unloaded all the shit flying around in my mind onto my blog. Sadly, I can't write everything I would like to, as certain people in my life read my blog religiously and get upset, jealous, etc.. that sucks as I wish I could just write everything I am doing, thinking, etc.. but I do try to write in a way that one can read a tad between the lines. Censorship sucks ass.
My fingers are KILLING me from doing so many massages. Fuck, my knuckles hurt so bad. I have been massaging pretty much non stop since I was 5 years old; starting on my mom and her hurtin' back and feet and it's taking a toll on my fingers as I don't just pet people, I insist on doing extreme deep tissue, which gives the patient lots of energy, but it takes mine. Guess that means at least my hands are getting old. dam!
Massage therapists are like shooting stars. They usually shine really bright for a few years, but they can't last forever. Usually people start doing massage at around 20 and throw in the towel after ten or 15 years as it is really taxing on the body (schlepping the heavy massage table up and down stairs, working odd hours usually spontaneously.. it is a difficult profession. I started WAY young and so I am feelin' it. I have met therapists that retired at age 40 already (well, they do other things for a living after; things that are not as physically taxing).
The rest of me feels great, it's just my knuckles and wrists that are aching. Tried wearing a copper bracelet for a while, I didn't notice a big difference. I wonder if that is just a scam/hoax?
It's gonna be tough leaving NYC again, this place is wild, ambitious, fast, loud, exciting, quirky, liberal, wealthy in every way and packed with talented people from all over the world, but most of all, it's FUN. Like Arnold said "I'll be back"
x
"A long, long time ago… I can still remember how
That music used to make me smile.
And I knew if I had my chance,
That I could make those people dance,
And maybe they'd be happy for a while.
But February made me shiver,
With every paper I'd deliver,
Bad news on the doorstep…
I couldn't take one more step.
I can't remember if I cried
When I read about his widowed bride
But something touched me deep inside,
The day the music died."
Getting ready to have my tonsil operation. They will be removed Tuesday morning, bright and early ( I will probably just stay up as I have to be there at 6am).
The fact that the NY Press dumped a few of it's writers, me and Ed Koch (former NYC mayor) included because of their new format isn't as annoying as the fact that they probably knew ahead of time, like end of July that they would be dumping my column as that is why they didn't bother to pay me for all 4 of my August columns or the first week of September's column. For all 5 weeks, my column was printed but yet they won't pay. They are passing the buck. The new editor David Blum changes his story all the time. First excuse was "it will just take longer, but you will get paid". Then it was "It is not my responsibility" then he told the New York Post reporter Keith Kelly that I was already paid and that he is "only in charge since 1 August" (DUH, that means he should pay me for August and Sept, no? WTF!??). The New York Press is simply passing the buck.
LAWYER TIME.
Jerry Portwood, the old editor, well, he is still there, but was demoted as now David Blum is the big cheese, claims it is the new editors responsibility. The paper simply disrespects it's writers; always has, always will. For the couple years I wrote for them, my column was ALWAYS punctual, yet my pay was always late. Always. They conveniently paid one month late and yet let me know one week before my column was dumped so you can imagine, I will never get paid. It's not the amount that bothers me, it is the principle that big corporations like Manhattan Media (which bought the paper recently ) can shit on the little people and get away with it.
The Libra in me is into justice and I can see it will take a while until Justice is served. I will keep you posted. Of course emails to David Blum and Jerry Portwood wouldn't hurt either. heh heh..
"Let it go" some say. Just let it go. Let the German guy who chased me (stalked me) and knocked me out in January get away with it, let the NY Press get away with having 5 weeks of my great sex column for free. Let everyone just go ahead and take advantage. Nice people get walked on, like a fucking rug. Karma is taking a break I see. Hope she gets back soon and kicks some serious ass.
Jasmine is in Italy now, studying Italian. She loves it there. I will visit her in October.. she said where she is, is like the Kreuzberg of Italy. Hippies galore. Dread locks galore. Cross yer fingers she is safe over there, my little flower.
ttyl
x
Britney Spears finally explains ^ her less than excellent performance at the MTV "music" awards last week
Q.
Why do most men pull away after sex and seem so disconnected?
Brown Sugar
A.
Men are not wired like women are. A very sarcastic but realistic way to get straight to
the point: "Men cuddle to Fuck and Women fuck to cuddle". You simply can not take this
personally. In fact, I found that the more apathetic I am after sex, the more the male
wants to cuddle. They feel SO intimate and out of control when they have sex that they
have to reestablish their Independence by pulling away, it usually happens subconsciously,
they aren't even aware that they are acting slightly selfish. I think cuddling is over
rated anyways; once you are both finished with sex, give each other some freakin' space to
breathe… Girls get energy, men basically slip into an after sex coma, they want to savor
the orgasm and talking or cuddling can be distracting. Let them pull away, they will come
to you when they need/want to, let them lead, there is no point making an issue out of it.
use this time (when he is busy on cloud nine) to go wash your naughty parts or get a glass
of water/wine etc..Don't stress, just let things flow and understand, that is how men behave
after sex..
Q.
There is this guy that I’ve been friends with for about 6 months. we are very
close and talk to each other almost every day, go out for lunch often and
travel together. He’s in the music business but not in a band. He’s a really
good guy and I've fallen for him, even though I didn’t find him initially
attractive. He says he cares for me and would do anything for me – even
offered me money when I was short on bills – I declined the offer. Basically,
takes very good care of me. One BIG problem – he's married. Now, nothing
physical has happened between us, as I have too much respect for him to ruin
his life. I don’t think his wife knows that I even exist – but I have
tremendous guilt about being so close with a married man. it's easy for most
people to say, then back off – but every time I have I miss him tremendously
and he calls from wherever he happens to be (even if it's Japan) to see where
I’ve been and if I’m ok. I know nothing about his relationship with his wife –
not even her name. although he talks about the rest of his family. there are
no children. Having been married, I know that he should not be keeping me as a
close friend and if I were his wife I would not want him around me. But, I
have kept it at arms length and even when we are drinking nothing has
happened. He has said on more than one occasion, "if he weren't married . ."
I guess what I’m looking for is advice on if I’m doing something wrong here.
He is always the one to contact me – I never call him – when I need to ask
him something I’ll send him a text or email – he calls me back or for no reason
at all. Ok – I’m done babbling
– give it to me!
Ramble-on Rose
A.
When someone takes the big plunge, as in, standing in front of a crowd saying
“I do” and “till death do us part” they should lie in the bed they’ve made. You feel
guilty because you know it’s not cool. Men are the gas and women are the breaks.
Also, the more time you spend with a taken man, the less time you have to meet
and get closer to a single man.
A LOT of married men say "if I weren't married" and "I will leave her soon" etc..
it's usually fucking bullshit. They give their best to the mistress and the wife
gets the tired fucking left-overs. I am not prude at all, just have seen WAY too
many girlfriends get hurt from married men and vice versa.
Why even bother hanging with a taken man? It will only lead to no good and if he
did leave his wife for you, you could never trust him; he could very well be taking
care of some other single woman, paying her bills and checking in on her etc.
If he is in the nurturing mood, he should have a child. If he doesn't like his marriage,
he should leave his wife, but not in the cowardly way (for another) he should end it,
wait a while, then try for you. This is yet another reason why I frown upon marriage.
It’s old fashioned and it seems the pressure of marriage is what makes people want to
stray. There are millions of single men, why waste time on a taken one?
Q.
Dear Dr. Dot,
I’m currently seeing this girl, and it’s going very well. She seems to like
me very much and the sex is great. But I’m used to more sexually adventurous
partners, and while I’m not bothered by the fact that she isn’t as
experimental as my usual type, there is one thing I wish she’d change- she
doesn’t swallow.
She dodges my cum whenever I finish anywhere outside of her (we are protected)
and often runs to the sink to spit it out if it’s in her mouth. I know she’s
happy when I do cum (and she cums frequently), but I just wish she would play
with my cum a little, feel it on her skin or taste it or something, anything
(I’ve been told by previous partners that I taste nice). How can I bring this
up without seeming needy or fetishistic?
-Needy Ejaculating Dude.
A.
I know many women who don't like to give head let alone swallow
a guys tide. Sometimes it's not the taste that makes a girl run
for the sink, it's the thought of doing it, texture and/or amount of spunk
she gets in her mouth. Are you a chunky style man? This will make most
girls gag. If not, it could be she was brought up thinking it's disgusting to
swallow or just plain find it unhygienic.
As with all things, communication is important, you
have to hint around to her like "it would turn me on if you let me cum
onto your tits" or "rub my juice all over your face ok sweetie?" Tell her it’s
good for her skin, which is true BUT make sure you don’t get any of your spunk
in her eyes! It stings like hell, makes the eye swell up and it will stay
blood red for hours. If after you ask her to do it and she still resists, you
may have to soothe yourself with the fact that you are at least getting oral
sex on a regular basis. Not
everyone can say that.
Q.
I was wondering if you could tell me where the line is between
charming persistence and creepy stalking. It sounds corny, but I’ve got a
crush on a girl, and I don't want to ease so much that she falls for someone
else, but I also don't want her to get a restraining order against me; not that
I’ve done anything to merit one. My problem is I have plenty of confidence,
which I've been told is the most important thing, but my form is – how sh ould I
put this – potentially intimidating.
At 6 feet tall and 255 lbs., with growing out damn near every hole in me,
I've been told by people who know me that to people who don't, I look like a
crazy mountain man. Of course, almost all of their suggestions include the words
"scissors", "contact lenses", and "American Eagle"; or something to that effect.
I am very fond of my mane, and the ancestry that it comes from, and see no
reason why I should have shave down and spend half my paycheck on my
wardrobe? To make a long story short (too late, I know), I need to know if there
is indeed a line between persistence and stalking, and how to identify it. I
would imagine it's different for every woman, and if so, is that an indication
of what type of woman she is? I would greatly appreciate your input on the
situation as a woman, as listening to my male friends has led to nothing.
willing to learn,
Mountain Man
p.s.: if you could, please use my question in your column. I’m sure there
lonely souls out there, both male and female, who are lonely as well; simply for
lack of knowing where the line is drawn.
A.
Try to tune into her actions and tone of voice when you talk to her:
Does she sound happy to hear from you when you call or say hello?
Does she smile and look into your eyes? Does she tell you when she is free?
It REALLY helps if you tune into a girl's signs. If we don't like a guy, we
find excuses to avoid meeting up with them and we turn off (not smiling, ending
each conversation as fast as possible). Ask her out for lunch or to a movie, if she
says yes, she doesn't hate you. Also, never call a girl everyday, as this may
either bore her or make her too secure. Keep her on her toes by quality not
quantity communication.
Things that are NOT a good idea are (a) showing up at her home or work place unannounced-
and I mean NEVR do this, even if you are dating for a long time. It's still called
STALKING and is the biggest, creepiest turn off! (b) Book a vacation for two without
asking her. These kind of surprises are too pushy and in my eyes, a sign that you are in
for more controlling behavior, even if it is disguised as a generous gesture.
Just because you are a big hairy oaf, doesn't mean girls
won't fall for you. A lot of women love big, hairy men. They want the opposite
of themselves, someone big and warm to protect them. Yoko Ono sang it best "every
man has a woman who loves him". Chin up and keep trying.
x
Q.
I just broke up with my boyfriend a little over a week a go, and I did agree to
be friends. Problem is, he does not seem to get that we have broken up. He still
calls me more then 10 times a day, still calls me pet names, and still thinks we
can go out on random dates. Recently I planned on going out on a date with
someone new. He didn't seem to get that I didn't need his help with the new guy.
He just kept calling that whole day asking if I needed help getting to where I
was meeting the new guy. He just doesn't get it. He still even says he loves me
and goes in between saying 'I want you back' and 'if you want to move on, don't
let me stop you.' What do I do about the clingy psycho?
Another problem, I'm interested in a guy that is in my lab. Can't quite tell if
he reciprocates the feeling. What are the normal signs you males give off? What
can I say? I'm bi and mainly spend my time girl watching. Not seeing of a guy
likes me back.
Beautiful Bi Bitch
A.
I am curious as to why you ended it with your ex. This would help
me help you. It is normal after a break up that one still holds on, so his behavior
isn't really psycho, he just can't seem to let go as easy as you can.
You must be able to see his number on your phone when he calls, so stop
answering his calls if you REALLY want him to stop calling! You are not doing him
any favors; you are merely making him suffer as he wants more than friendship and you don't.
You have to tell him the truth. If you want him out of your life, tell him you want
a change and you need time alone to think. Even if you think there is a slight chance of
you two getting back together, tell him you need time to think. You need space and time.
Take advantage of the Caller ID on your phone and stop answering him.
About the guy in your lab. If you can't tell he likes you, it isn't even worth
your time. Men let the ladies know when they are interested. It's not the female’s job
to drag it out of him. Men pursue, women are pursued. Naturally this doesn’t apply to
gays/lesbians/bi’s. But if it’s a heterosexual man you want, let him lead, for the best results.
Q.
Is it safe to cum inside my pregnant wife? I don’t want to make her have twins or cause any harm.
I hate condoms and I am too horney to wait until it comes out.
Freaked out Frank
A.
You are either too naive or dumb to be procreating anyways, but I will answer you to calm your nerves.
No, it won’t harm the baby (unless you fuck around with other women without a condom and drag some nasty
disease home to your wife). And you can’t get pregnant women pregnant again.
* Send all your questions to me, I will change your name to save your sorry ass from embarrassment
x
Doomed Dr. Dot
"I’m saddened to learn that Dr. Dot’s sex column will no longer be running in your publication. While I understand that with new ownership comes change, I hope it will be taken into consideration by Manhattan Media that the loyal readers of the NY Press did not ask for change and certainly are not looking for a more conservative publication. Dr. Dot is…Dr. Dot and, frankly, that’s what your readers want. Sex cannot be removed from real life, and I think to remove Dr. Dot’s column will not only make the paper just another ordinary publication, it will lose you a lot of readers. New Editor-in-Chief David Blum, having previously been with the Village Voice, surely knows this to be true and knows what it takes to make a publication unique.
—Kathy Beall, flight attendant and loyal NY Press reader"
If you want to express your self about my column to the NY Press (it won't help anyways) but you can write to:
editorial@nypress.com
Click HERE to see it online.
I am grateful for having a page in the NY Press for so long. Hoping something else in the city comes along, some paper with enough balls to host my column. My column is still alive and kicking here online and in the ExBerliner < click it
x
both photos by Mark Mann
>
Danny and I love to make videos. I bought this game called "Anal ring toss" from the Romantic Depot and was dying to try it out, well, on someone else. Hope you like the video.
x
< NOT gay
Ok I think it's best I make a few tiny blogs at this point, rather than one giant one. I had a LONG flight to NYC and luckily I sat next to a cheery lad named Bryan. He is from Wisconsin and was in Berlin visiting his girlfriend (who was an exchange student in th USA for one year). She made him a shirt, that he had on, that said "I LOVE STEFFI" with a picture of them two together. The boy is LOVE SICK.
He and I chatted the whole flight and suffered together the WHOLE flight. It's not bad enough that it's 9 hours but they took an extra hour deciding when to fucking take off. GRRRRRRRRRRRRR. We had an empty seat between us so it was ok. Poor kid had to change planes in NYC and missed his connecting flight and had to wait 6 hours for the next flight (he told me this on line). Have you ever seen the flick "planes, trains and automobiles"? You get the drift. HELL.
^ I am wearing a string thong fyi …. (Mein arsch ist 'ne slip fresser)
It doesn't take me long to get back into the swing of things. Hanging out with my gay friends, baring our asses all over the place.. Danny is starting to get into karaoke, like me. He sings Abba "Waterloo" and "Sweet Transvestite" from the Rocky Horror Picture show soundtrack and "I touch myself" by the Dyvinls (sp?). He also belts out "you ain't woman enough to steal my man".
I sang "Rehab" by Amy Winehouse, "Coshise" by Audioslave, "Hurt so good" by John Cougar and"what's love go to do with it" by Tina Turner. Things are rather slow, erm, empty in the city, but I am sure that will change after Labor Day. Then it gets packed again.
^VERY gay
Danny and I ate at my favorite restaurant, the Yaffa Cafe (St. Marks Place). It's open 24/7 and has EVERYTHING. The cooks are outrageous and it's cheap.The gaudy, tacky surroundings keep your eyes busy throughout the meal if you get sick of looking at your dinner date. Perfect for taking pics.
Danny is in school to be a TV writer. We are already working on our first screen play too. My idea, but he will have to write it, as I haven't the time. It's a movie, well, centered around music, that's all I can tell you for now, snap.
I can't believe Danny has never posed at Times Square yet. He almost got run over, pants down and all. Anyways, I am happy to be back in the USA, NYC fucking ROCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I feel overwhelmed though, as I have to write my weekly column today and I STILL have not finished my Zappanale blog. UGH!! I have to do it within 48 hours or I will enter "self loathing" territory and won't be able to sleep. If I don't write, I feel constipated. Like posting a big blog makes me feel lighter, you know that feeling I am talking about. Like you just took the BEST dump ever. I am a blog addict. I admit it. It's 7am and the sun is shining and I am STILL UP. Back to my old sleep pattern. The sun is over rated anyways.
Ttyl
x
ps. I got a call from a VIP, so I could be going to Philly this weekend to massage them. Would LOVE to say who it is, but that would jinx it..