Could NOT believe my fucking eyeballs today. Walking down the street in Berlin “Mitte” and saw this on the side of a building, above a cafe, packed with people drinking coffe etc.. WTF??
Colon Cleansing and all that shit (don’t read while eating)
I remember sitting with all my Russian girlfriends in Berlin years ago at one of the 5 star restaurants they picked out in Grunewald talking about Colon Cleansing. I am guessing they were all a few years older than I, most were my clients, as they came to me for cellulite massage treatments but we never discussed age. In fact I think discussing one's age or anyone's age is fucking stupid. Who cares how old anyone is really.
Back to the ass cleaning- they all talked about their last colon cleansing and when it came to my turn to dish I just had this pale look, this lost expression on m face as I was an ass cleaning virgin. I told them I have never done that and they ALL stopped talking and looked at me as if I just said I cut up babies and put them in my garbage disposal every night. “WHAT!??? THAT IS DISGUSTING!!!!!!!!!”
Wtf does THIS say?
(фото: drdot.com)
9 апреля, 16:55 После недолгого обсуждения и волевого решения главного редактора мы все-таки публикуем то самое фото грузинского президента с массажисткой из Германии. На месте грузинской оппозиции газета ВЗГЛЯД тоже бы немного позавидовала Саакашвили. Но только немного.
Things that make you go ‘hmmmmmmmm’
Stereophonics in NYC
Seeing the Stereophonics again was so fun. It's not everyday I get to massage a band that looks as good as they sound. They are ear and eye candy. Even listening to them talk is fun. Three of the guys in the band are from Wales (singer, bass, keyboards), one from Birmingham (guitar) and the drummer is from Argentina. A great mix.
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| Jasmine took this shot ^ without flash (she HATES flash) |
A Security guard took this one (with flash- I love flash) heh heh |
As you can see ^ they played the Webster Hall and they sold it out. It was heaving with people who seemed to know the words to every song. As I walked through the crowd, I noticed most of the crowd was Scottish, Irish, English, Welsh and a of course some were yanks. This band is getting bigger all the time, more and more popular and for good reason. They sound AMAZING.
Jasmine and I met briefly and ate something while the opening act played (sorry, I have a tiny attention span). I massaged the Stereophonics earlier on and wanted to give them some space and eat with Jasmine. We ate at the BEST falafel place in NYC (it's called Tahini ). OMG. Naturally I invited her to the show, just like I invited her to meet Gene Simmons the other night, but she is focused and not letting me be a bad, rock and roll influence on her. Yay. Mission accomplished. Raise a well focused child 🙂
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Adam wasn't with the band the last time I massaged them in Berlin (see that BLOG ) |
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Javier told me he got his Salvador Dali inspired tattoos by a Tattoo artist based in Paris named Tin Tin
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I LOVE the moments before show time when a band warms up ^ |
 Standard dressing room behavior now a days, MAC in hand |
Kelly is so fucking sweet. He showed me pictures of his two daughters, omg, SUPER CUTE!!!
He told me where Broccoli got it's name. He said it comes from the Cauliflower family, it's the brother of Cauliflower actually, hence the name BRO-Cauli (get it?) ha ha.
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| Adam is the one from Birmingham. He accent is heavier than my Stepmothers gravy. |
This is one of the hardest bands to photograph; they never hold still and their light show is outrageous. I am lucky I got these two live shots.
I can not stress the fact enough how perfect the sound was. This must be the BEST venue to play in NYC. The band nailed it. Sold out show, sounded spectacular and everyone was singing along, dancing, sweating together and happy as fook.
So, there is the set list Chris (manager) peeled off the dressing room wall for me ^
They played for nearly two hours and seemed to never tired. I am surprised Kelly had any voice left after the gig, he sings so unique, hard to describe, in fact, you would have to hear/see them on youtube to know what I mean. Also, Kelly and Adam took turns playing lead guitar, which was cool.
All bands want time to themselves after they get off stage. They want to dry off, shower, have a drink and calm down from the huge adrenaline rush they get from playing live on stage. So, I waited outside their dressing room, on a tiny, cushy chair, reading emails on my blackberry when three people came and stood RIGHT in front of me. I had both feet on the chair, barefoot and heavily into my crackberry. One of my foot slipped and hit the guy RIGHT in front of me in the back of his leg. He turned around and said "oh, I am sorry, am I in your way, should I move?". He thought I kicked him on purpose. I said "sorry, did I hit you?", then he said "sorry, I'm in your way right?" ha ha. Anyways, I told him he wasn't in my way and the girl he was with, gets close to my ear and asks if I am with the band. I told her yes, I am their massage therapist for the evening. In her heavy English accent she tells me her name and says she is with Chase Crawford of Gossip girl and he wants to meet the band and asked if I could help them.
I have never seen the show, but have heard/read of it and felt like a right cunt for kicking Chase Crawford in the back of the leg, even if it was accidental. OMFG. Certainly I would help them meet the band now, now that I almost knocked him down lol. I texted the manager and told him and we had to wait a while as they STILL need to dry off. So Chase wants to try out my hands, so naturally, (look at him ok?) I was happy to oblige. How the fuck can someone be so good looking? Jesus. Last time I was face to face with such a perfect looking man was when I met Josh Hartnett backstage at Live 8. He was as friendly as he could be without pissing his date, Scarlett Johansson off. She was NOT happy at all that he was talking to other females. wtf? She's one of the most gorgeous women alive, so why the 'tude? Pffft! Needless to say, it didn't last. Anyways, so I rubbed Chase down for a while and he tells me that it's the "best massages he's ever had" and he took my card and said he will definitely be calling. Behave. It's just a massage. But hey, one can still think "schwing" or not? Happy to let you know, Chase isn't just beautiful, he is polite, friendly and sweet (and he has a great taste in music). I can only imagine how many girls swoon for this young man.
Feast your eyes on these lovely lads ladies! (and poop pushers) ^
You know I am bad with names. The blonde is from Glasgow and the Brunette is American. Both fun, we hung out and went to the pub after with the band where everyone feasted on chicken wings and Guinness (not me, I had ONE glass of wine as I drive). I sat in between Kelly and Adam and wouldn't have traded my spot for anything. Super cozy and loads of laughs with these two. We spoke of Paul Weller and their recent gig up in Toronto with Oasis and Weller (did you hear a crazy fan pushed Noel off stage DURING the show?? wtf!!)
You can SEE a video of it HERE (it happens at 1 minute 28 seconds). Feel sorry for Noel, he is a sweet heart, really! Fucking idiots attacking artists on stage (or killing them like with Pantera). What is the world coming to eh? Peace people, peace.
Last pic ^ I massaged Roberts (bassist) left hand for ages. They have been touring for over a year now and I think they need a break soon, they are all aching and I could tell they need a break. Touring is SO hard on the body, it's ridiculous. Better them than me, I am not into touring anymore, no matter how cushy the tour (the Rolling Stones for example) it still drains ya. Your sleeping and eating routine gets really out of wack (like my sleep "routine" could be any worse) and you meet strangers every day, everyone talks your fucking ears off and the artist have to be nice to everyone and miss their loved ones at home. I feel sorry for them and the least I can do is give them a massage and make them laugh a bit, to show musicians how grateful I am, at least, for doing what they do. "Music is the best" FZ
It's now 8am and I have to get to bed (couldn't sleep until I crapped this blog out)
Last but not least, Stereophonics tour dates (guess they're not taking a break yet 🙂
Sept 11 208 8:00P 9.30 Club Washington DC
Sept 12 2008 8:00P Mr Smalls Theatre Pittsburgh, PA
Sept 13 2008 8:00P Metro Chicago, IL
Sept 16 2008 8:00P Henry Fonda Thatre Los Angeles, CA
Sept 17 2008 8:00P Great American Music Hall San Francisico, CA
Sept 19 2008 8:00P Wonder Ballroom Portalnd, OR
Sept 20 2008 8:00P Commodore Ballroom Vancouver, BC
Sept 21 2008 8:00P Showbox Market Seattle, WA
Dec 2 2008 8:00P SECC Glasgow, Scotland
Dec 3 2008 8:00P SECC Glasgow, Scotland
Dec 4 2008 8:00P AECC Aberdeen, Scotland
Dec 6 2008 8:00P International Arena Cardiff,Wales
Dec 7 2008 8:00P International Arena Cardiff, Wales
Dec 9 2008 8:00P Echo Arena Liverpool, UK
Dec 10 2008 8:00P MEN Arena Manchester, UK
Dec 12 2008 8:00P Metro Radio Arena Newcastle, UK
Dec 13 2008 8:00P Trent Arena Nottingham, UK
Dec 15 2008 8:00P NIA Birmingham, UK
Dec 17 2008 8:00P International Centre Boumemouth, UK
Dec 19 2008 8:00P Arena Sheffield, UK
Dec 20 2008 8:00P O2 Arena London, UK